Yeah...

Did you open it?

No. She seemed really serious about it, so I don't want to have to deal with her if she wants to make sure I didn't open it. Guess I'll find out when the rapture happens...

Just steam open it and re-seal. Don't be girl.

Hah, yeah I probably will. I just can't believe she was so melodramatic about the whole thing, but whatever

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Good lord, if my mother did that I'd be rolling around on the floor laughing for an hour.

Scan it and post it here

Wait, wtf, save it for the rapture? Are you an atheist / not Xian, but your parents are? Cause if you're of the faith, then won't you and she disappear when the rapture happens?

Hahahahaha

hahaha

ha

Open it and scan it/post it some form. You have to.

INTERNET PEER PRESSURE

POST IT HERE

DO IT

It must be done!

http://dooit.ytmnd.com/

DO IT! It will be hilarious.

I'm not an athiest, I just don't care about religion. Straight up don't give a shit.

And yeah, I will try to post it. Tomorrow I might do the steam thing.

Technically if the rapture happens, you wouldn't be around to open it. So just open it when no one is around.

Did anyone else think this was a reference to Bioshock when they read the topic?

I'd like to see this.

Hey, it's Rei.

>_> um, hi guys.

FUCK ITS REI!
sup

and scans must be posted. this should also go on /b/

and LL

wtf Ty?

>_>? Did I do something wrong?

Here's the twist.




















It's anthrax.

Apparently that's not what his parents think.

Easy, start playing Bioshock. You'll be in Rapture within minutes.

Your mother seriously expects that if Jesus descends from on high in a blaze of glory you are going to go 'hold on a sec Lord' and open your emergency in case of Rapture envelope? or while you are speaking in tongues you will reach for your instruction packet?

This is pretty fascinating. I guess your mother thinks ahead.

It's you're adoption papers.

Open it, piss on it, and then rub her face in it like a dog.

Here's the weirdest part though, what is a note going to do for you if a rapture did happen?

"LOL son ur probly wonderin why my soul was lifted up 2 heven...well guss wut? UR FUCKED! GET READY FUR 1000 YEARS OF HELL ON EARTH!"

*Note: I'm not exactly 100% sure what happens during the Rapture.

It's a single line of text.

"SHOULD HAVE GONE TO CHURCH BITCH"

It's a picture of her naked.

would you kindly open it

Jesus, I wish...

Post of the week.

Open it and upload or ban

This man speaks with the authority of the 404 overlords.

It's sort of like...well...having sex meant that me and her were supposed to have been connected by a USB cord from then on, and she was hooked up and ready to go, only she couldn't connect with me because I was firewire.

I might start handing out letters bearing this marking to people. That sounds like a fun thing to do.

You have to make a video about this now. NOW!

You have to open that shit. Now.

That would make a good video. I don't know that I'll do it NOW though...

I will definitely do it though. I should do it right as the Rapture happens.

It probably says "I knew you wouldn't do this one simple thing for me. You are now disowned."

We should have a snow day tomorrow so I know what I'll be doing...

Tomorrow? Awww man. *throws tantrum*

Even if I open it, I can't promise that I will post it all. My mom is very melodramatic, but I'm sure that much of it will be incredibly personal (jesus I'd hope if it's going to be the summation of everything she wants to say to me or something), so you might only get bits and pieces.

Batman you bastard, just open the goddamn thing already!!!!!!

I suggest you read this:



We're living in a society. You don't make empty promises. I expect to be reading that shit in it's entirety today.